a dad in the GOOD LIFE

Seriously, she's here.

2010-04-12T22:20:00.000-04:00

Meet Ellise "Ellie" Clementine Love Strong. Born on April 8, 2010, at 12:29 am after an unexpected induction the morning before. A perfect 7 pounds 11 ounces; 19.5 inches long.

On Wednesday, C and I showed up to what we hoped might be our last OB-GYN check up. C's blood pressure had measured high at the beginning of the previous three appointments and we weren't surprised that this visit was the same. Oddly, this time around her blood pressure stayed up. Our doctor sent us down the hall for a non-stress test. Thirty minutes later C's only thought was how late she would be for a meeting she had scheduled at work. After a third high blood pressure measurement our doctor came in to point out that our baby's heart rate dropped slightly after a mild contraction. This was enough to convince her to order us to labor and delivery. She realized how panicked we looked and asked if we were packed. Nope! She told us to go home, pack, eat something, and check into the hospital as quickly as possible...
(to be continued)

Family Time

2010-04-05T09:53:00.001-04:00

Picked this up at the library--just what I was looking for; more or less a reggae album for kids. Ziggy Marley's Family Time. So far so good--too excited, I couldn't wait to get through the whole album before posting about it. The album features other Marley siblings, Jack Johnson, Toots (Hibbert), Willie Nelson, Paul Simon, and others. Very mello and upbeat, not far from the great Bob Marley, but with tunes that really focus on family. So great! Can't wait to rock this while dancing with Ms. Baby, enjoying a warm and sunny day, or brightening up a gloomy one. Enjoy!

Week 39

2010-04-04T18:10:00.002-04:00

week 30 v. week 39

Prep

2010-04-03T15:06:00.001-04:00

We have 8 days left until Ms. Baby is expected to arrive, in theory. Looking ahead to what might amount to chaos (or at least total exhaustion), C is in the middle of preparing 4 casseroles to freeze. Last week she made a large lasagna and froze all that we didn't eat. It's pretty awesome, 'cause C is a good cook and has some impressive instincts when it comes to personalizing a recipe to make it even better.
--
Meanwhile, working on the last of the baby laundry which is mostly flannel receiving blankets, sheets, and miscellaneous fitted covers for stuff... Need to finish up some art and might even go to a nearby antique store for extra decor... I promise, nursery photos will be up soon.

She's here!

2010-04-01T17:59:00.000-04:00

Our baby has arrived! April Fool's, I keed, I keed.

But April has arrived; the month of the birth of Ms. Baby. C is getting anxious and I don't blame her. Sleep has become hard to keep straight for her. The doctor keeps saying she's not yet dilated. What the d? But things are great though. Slowly but surely the nursery is getting finished up. On this beautiful, sunny, 79-degree day I unwrapped our crib mattress and have it propped up outside to air-out per the recommendations of others. Just need to finish up some art projects for the room and we'll be rollin.

Lots of love

This week: full moon, fools day

2010-03-29T15:42:00.000-04:00

This week presents a few challenges:
A full moon tomorrow which, if you are superstitious, could trigger the birth of Ms. Baby

Also, April Fool's Day on Thursday, which at the very least will mean C will call me to say she's going into labor and even if it's true I will think she's lying

All good + Census?

2010-03-24T12:37:00.000-04:00

All is well according to our doctor who was super nice and reassuring today and complemented C on her "perfect baby bump." In fact, the news was great. Even C's blood pressure measured high at first, but at the end of the appointment it was back down to normal--she was stressed about nothing! In the cervical exam, still no dilation but the doctor felt Ms. Baby's head! Say wha?!
--
Anyway, the 2010 Census form has been sitting on our desk at home, waiting to be filled out. The question remains: how many people will be living in our home on April 1st? Problem is, we don't know yet! I'm pretty sure it will still be 2, but can't know exactly. So, I want to get that mailed back--and let me just say, I was pretty disappointed with the Census; I thought it was going to ask cool questions like How many times do you bike each week? Do you smoke drugs? What's the craziest thing you've ever done? or What do you want your government to do for you?--but I feel like I should wait until next week.
--
Still no name...

T minus 3 weeks

2010-03-23T19:03:00.000-04:00

We are well into 37 weeks and the pressure is on; mostly pressure on your mom's back and feet, but also the pressure of finding a pediatrician, looking further into daycare options, and, lastly, deciding on a name for you, Ms. Baby.
--
As a point of reference, in the timetable of our own pregnancy, my cousin Emily would have already given birth to her daughter Audrey by now. The pregnancy calendar we follow online says that Ms. Baby can do everything a "newborn" can and that all the extra time spent in the womb is allowing her brain to develop some awesome stuff. Pretty amazing.

I am pretty close to start packing a bag. Also, I decided today that I would go ahead and put our car seat bases in our two cars, just to be a little bit more prepared in the event of "Here we go!"

Sleep

2010-03-21T18:15:00.002-04:00

(I'm relaying this story at C's request)

Let me be the first to admit, based on the accounts told to me, I have a habit of talking in my sleep. It's not gibberish, but coherent if not ridiculous words, strung together in sentences, and usually in response to something very real. Last night was one of those occasions. I guess my latest instances of talking in my sleep have been to "shush" anyone or thing making noise. At some point, after being awake for over an hour in the middle of the night, C coughed, and I instantly let out a prolonged "Shhhhhhhhhh." She laughed, and as I moved to reorient myself in bed, I responded "Thanks a lot for waking me up." C called me a jerk, to which I continued "No, seriously: thanks for waking me up." At this point I was partially awake, since I remember saying "No, that's not what I mean" but then go on to say something about the paint in the room, according to C.

Anyway, C keeps bringing this up, and we have been laughing about the fact I might have a lot of trouble trying to wake up for Baby Girl. I can just imagine her crying and me saying "Shhhhhhhhhh."

In other sleep news, C has been consistently waking up at 3am and staying awake until around 5... she has been painfully annoyed during those sleepless hours but admits she hasn't been suffering with fatigue during the day.
--
Weather has been amazing, recently, and we're trying to get so much stuff done, especially doing stuff outside, including walking Alden. Today on a walk we connected with a neighbor who just had a baby girl in November. I'm excited about having another young new parent on the block and hope we can get together soon.

Transcript of our chat

2010-03-18T10:54:00.000-04:00

C: i forgot to put my wedding ring on today and it feels really weird, even though i've not been wearing it at nights

me: OMG. dudes will be hitting on you

C: haha, probably

me: promising to help you raise your baby

dont go with them

C: although at tim horton's in the bathroom one woman says "you look super great!" and then she walks out and another girl says "i love your belly"

haha

me: really?! that's rad

C: the "you look super great" comment was weird

like crazy doll-lady on tv show weird

me: ha

me: that's going on the Dad blog

Imagining

2010-03-17T11:00:00.000-04:00

I was trying to explain to my brother yesterday how excited and anxious I am to meet our daughter. We're starting to organize her room--setting aside this space for a new person--and everyday her presence is becoming more and more realized. Lately, in just the past week, I've been trying hard to imagine holding her in my arms and connecting with her, learning her personality, absorbing everything she is. It's impossible to do right now, but I know my world will be flipped.

Yesterday I heard a sound bite in a commercial for a new show about "parenthood," and one of the characters (presumably a dad) said something super negative about having kids. It made me so mad! I wish I could remember the exact words. Maybe it had to do with giving up your personal life, or sleep, or whatever, but it was intended to be depressing. Granted, the show is fiction; part comedy; but it was something I could imagine some jaded, cynical asshole saying to scare some other expecting father, like a war story, to gain some sort of credit and back-patting. It sucked to hear because I am excited and ready for this to be the best thing ever. Is it worth hearing some bad news to expect the worst, while hoping for the best? I think it's more about attitude, shaped by optimism and love combined with a healthy mix of humor and altruism.

Baby's Delight: "Coz I'm D - J - Dad"

2010-03-16T09:57:00.002-04:00

On Sunday, at Chipotle*, I was feeling really good (like usual, when I have a steak fajita burrito in my hands). For whatever reason I was reminded about when, in college, I got serious about buying some turntables and a mixer and learning how to scratch records. My friend Brody was a DJ and would let me goof around on his tables. (I still think I could be a pretty good mix-ologist and constantly think of songs to mash up. For example: Ludacris's "How Low (Can You Go)" with General Larry Platt's "Pants on the Ground." I know, right?)

Anyway, I asked C if she remembered when I wanted turntables. She mentioned I should get some and set them up in the basement. I agreed and instantly considered the fact that I could throw dance parties for Baby Girl; then I realized I could DJ all of her school dances and simultaneously keep watch over her and, while rapping about whatever, I could throw in some lines telling boys to keep their filthy little hands off of her. So, in Chipotle, I started rapping out loud in an old-school rap voice (a la Sugarhill Gang's "Rapper's Delight") about being DJ Dad.

So, that's the new persona I created and intend on using throughout Baby Girl's childhood, to her delight (not embarrassment, duh!).

--
*Side note: I'm so glad that C still likes Chipotle!

Gift + End of Showers

2010-03-14T21:58:00.001-04:00

We found this in the mail today - a gift from a far away friend from college; this awesome pink skull beanie from Anitra with this note:
Congratulations on your future daughter! She will be totally awesome and badass. Best of luck! Anitra

How cool is that?!
--
This weekend was the second baby shower and it was great. Lots of fun to celebrate the next member to be initiated into our crazy big family, especially when you get to share that with those who will be Baby Girl's Great Grandmas and Great Great Aunts.

Today we've spent the afternoon sorting out all the stuff we received from both of our baby showers; moved the futon out of and moved a new Ikea dresser into the nursery; started a monster sized laundry load of all clothes that should fit a baby between 0 and 6 months; and packed up all the stuff that Baby Girl won't need for after then. Things around the house are starting to finally take shape and I don't feel like we're behind in any way. At the very least we can tell people that we do have space for Baby Girl.

Getting overly excited now!

36 week ultrasound + Nursery + Daycare

2010-03-12T11:14:00.000-05:00

We went for our last ultrasound this morning and were relieved to once again hear all is well. Baby Girl is only measuring slightly ahead--an estimated 6 pounds 6 ounces--which will put her at about 8 pounds at term. The best news is that she's low and head-down, and shouldn't be able to sneak her way into a breech position between now and whenever.

We have also been setting up some of our gear. This week, in the mail, we received two gifts from our registries: a bouncer and a travel system. I figure this has two benefits: 1) our dog Alden can get used to a new family member crowding into our space and start learning what he's not allowed to chew on; and 2) that stuff will be together and usable when we have better things to worry about.

A dresser (which will double as a changing table) is on its way, and I've decided we should get a rug and some sort of book shelf too. With that, the nursery will be nearly complete. I've been getting frustrated as people have asked increasingly if we're done with the nursery. They ask it almost rhetorically, expecting my answer to be an exasperated "Yessss! Months ago!" and give me a disgusted look when I huff out a "Nope." Plus, all the pregnant women C works with are proud to announce the completion of the nurseries in month 3. Well Eff that.

Oh yeah, and I've started into searching for infant daycare, and that sucks. Lots of responses, which is encouraging. I just wish it was more straightforward. And cheaper. I wish we could figure out some sort of trade-off system with three of four other people, to rotate stay-home days. Probably not going to happen. I never thought it would be so smart to live nearby our parents for this reason.

March Showers Bring April Babies

2010-03-07T17:47:00.000-05:00

Like I said in the last post, this weekend was the first of two baby showers. While I had very little to do with the happenings and can't be too sure what went down, I was able to show up before the guests had departed to thank them for the mountain of gifts that were piled in the corner. Lots of great people, smiles, food, and gifts.

One of the stand out gifts of the shower was a quilt made by C's Nanny (grandma). I've been so excited since I found out Baby Girl was going to get a Nanny quilt, since this will be the closest I'll be to getting one of my own. It's awesome. C has one too and it's just as great.

Another stand out gift was a wrap that is to be used like a sling to hold a baby in a multitude of positions. It's super hippie style. I even got to try it out with our cousin's 5 month old baby girl. Fortunately I have a few more weeks to practice with puppy Alden.

Anyway, it was a fun weekend, hanging out with family. After getting back to our town, we exploded into our house and realized we (currently) have no place to put any one thing we got. Crap!

March is here! (a.k.a. 34 weeks) (a.k.a. T-minus-6 weeks!)

2010-03-01T13:20:00.000-05:00

I can't believe we are at 34 weeks already. The uncertain amount of time left is presumed to be an even month-and-a-half and we're starting to bite our nails. The suspense is getting heavy. At my job, I've got a project looming over my head which promises to take me out of town for three three-day trips. We haven't "won" the job yet and the more I think about it, the more I get sick thinking about being so far from home and C going into labor. Anyway, I'm trying to be optimistic that luck will guide us through this month. I mean, I have two four-leaf clovers that I've been saving for some time now and figured I could cash one in for March in the spirit of Saint Patrick's Day. Sure, I can't be too certain that I have any Irish blood in me, but I suspect that in this case "it's the thought that counts."

I feel like as soon as April 1st hits, our baby will be on its way, arriving any minute thereon.

Meanwhile, I'm looking into other career options and wish that looked a little brighter. It seems like there are only a few doors available to me, and most of them lead back to school. Dammit!
--
In other news, we picked up and assembled our crib this weekend! Woohoo! We also added a few more splashes of paint to the nursery.

Also, we're preparing for the first of TWO baby showers which will be this weekend and next.

Inspiration: Forest Kindergarten

2010-02-26T15:44:00.004-05:00

The forest kindergarten at the Waldorf School of Saratoga Springs is one of a handful in the United States that are taking that concept [reconnecting children with nature] to another level: its 23 pupils, ages 3 ½ to 6, spend three hours each day outside regardless of the weather.
from a nytimes article (here)

Tummy Tales

2010-02-24T15:56:00.001-05:00

At her appointment this morning the doctor told C that the mysterious stomach aches she has been feeling frequently could be Braxton Hicks contractions! Not so fun for her as they've been a source of discomfort--but a relief for me to think they could be a sign that her body is working the way it should!

Sleep

2010-02-23T14:13:00.000-05:00

C has been waking up at 4AM on the dot. That sucks. For her, not me, duh. Amazingly, I've been waking up, too, and managing to talk to her, even if only for a few words before passing out again.

Her back has been really hurting and she's been having an achy stomach or heartburn which seem to alternate randomly. I can only figure that this is the build up before the storm. Mostly she is tired all day long after a crappy night's sleep, and it's not helping that she has been working so hard. Taking naps in the evening is only working against her.

Anyway, we're working hard to stay positive..!

Gifts, House, Bathroom (T Minus 7 Weeks)

2010-02-22T13:03:00.002-05:00

Not much to say--actually, plenty is going on, just nothing to write about. All you need to know is Time is moving slow and fast.

We received our first present off our registry from our cousin in the mail!(Phew! Count the number of prepositions in that sentence!) And we ordered our crib yesterday! That should be here... probably before the baby comes. More art is getting finished and our baby's room is going to be rad-with-a-capital-R, as they say.

Plumbers are supposed to be here tomorrow to start the first step in constructing a second bathroom in our basement. I have no clue what is to be done and am worried that it's going to be messed up on my watch. Messed up and expensive. I can deal with "awesome and expensive" but not "messed up."

What does that do with being a dad, you ask? Everything. Ultimately this bathroom will serve our ~~babysitters~~ friends and family and hopefully attract a few more to stay for longer trips; longer down the road, when our daughter is an angst-ful, hormonal teen and getting ready for ~~dates~~ school or whatever, we wont be fighting over the space. Anyway, we agreed a while ago it was something to get done before Baby arrives, so here we are: the eleventh hour.

Birth 101

2010-02-15T09:10:00.001-05:00

This weekend was our "Express Labor & Delivery" course. I can't believe that it was as bad as C expected, but I'll say that she wasn't too impressed and that I know she wouldn't do it again. Honestly, it was a lot of fluff; stuff we've read about a lot of times, in books and on the internet. But it was nice to see examples of how women deal with pain and stress relief, and I do well with multiple, supplemental modes of learning. I even took notes. Altogether, I figure, some of that information has got to stick in my head.

I was pretty glad to be done with it, and couldn't imagine going to that class drawn out over 5 weeks. The most useful 2 things I think we walked away with is (1) the email of the instructor who seems to be the nicest, kindest nurse ever and (2) a tour of the maternity pavilion. I was also pretty impressed with how useful a fitness ball can be during labor. I've already developed an idea of what a perfect labor would be, but, as we keep reading, we can't go in with very many expectations.
--
That said, I have big hopes that we can get in one of the three rooms with a jacuzzi tub in it. Cause I'm bringin my swim trunks.

Doctor Visit: Week 31

2010-02-10T10:28:00.002-05:00

Joined C on a doctor visit this morning. All is well. C's baby bump is measuring 33 weeks when we are really at 31 weeks, which might only mean a big bambino. Baby's heart rate is good and normal. I asked about the somersault the baby did this morning, and apparently that's still okay at this point.

These appointments go really fast. The doctor is only in the room for about 5 minutes or so. I'm not sure what else to expect from her, but I just wish she would offer up more details about what we should be looking forward to. I suppose the problem is we never ask good questions. I bet that would spur her to talk.
--
I haven't been to every doctor appointment. Not because I don't want to be there, but C has insisted that they aren't very important and that she doesn't care if I'm there. When she says "I don't care" I hear "I don't want you to be there." Because if she did want me to be there, she would care. I'm okay with not being there if it's easier for her to be there alone with the doctor. But that's not it. She admitted yesterday that it's about making a (big) deal about going to the doctor when it shouldn't be that way. I think it's important, and I feel like an unsupportive jerk when I don't tag along.

Last night, realizing that my work schedule has changed quite a bit, I didn't even have something I needed to do (i.e. my job), so I made the decision to join her. If nothing else I got her to laugh a bit and it was nice to hang out a little while longer before trudging to the office.

Breaking News in the Real World: Work less, but not work-less

2010-02-08T16:37:00.001-05:00

My company isn't doing so hot, so this Monday morning we three employees were told cuts in hours were to be made, effective immediately. Fortunately, for me, this means a 32 hour work week at the same pay rate, keeping my benefits (which may or may not be necessary), and potentially an extra day of my week devoted to the personal time I value so dearly.

This isn't necessarily permanent (my boss explained this change should only last 2 or 3 months, until seasonal work picks back up); but without having consulted our budget, it could prove to be a great situation for our family. A day I could devote to being Daddy Daycare; a day less of paying some stranger to watch our kid; a day less of wage earning to pay for some stranger to watch our kid, thus helping to balance this change in our income....

Not sure what will come of it, exactly, but for now the mood is very positive! Good life go!

As they say: To be continued...

Names, Art, More Prep

2010-02-07T18:11:00.000-05:00

This weekend: finished a little bit more art that will go in your room, Baby. Also, added more items to the registry at Babies "R" Us; and started looking at Italian and Polish girl names (and found a bunch I like!)...

Also, your Aunt Amanda and Uncle Andy came up to visit from Cincy. We gave them our bed and Mommy and I "slept" on the futon in what will be your room. It was probably because of all the white snow reflecting light, but it was bright as day all night long. Today I installed some nice white blinds in your room and am pretty proud of how they turned out.

Lots of love!

Proof

2010-02-04T22:06:00.000-05:00

Baby School + Baby School of Rock

2010-02-04T09:43:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, after a long time of procrastinating on making a decision, I called the "Moms" hotline at our hospital to reserve our spot in an upcoming "labor and birth class." I'm pretty pumped about it--I do well with instruction; C isn't so pumped. For that reason we chose the 2-day Express option for next week. I told her it's my Valentine's Day gift to her. I keed. But I am excited, and I think it will be a good milestone to add to this journey. I was a little weird-ed out when the telephone operator (nurse?) suggested that we were scheduling our class a bit early relative to our due-date and that we could forget stuff... WTF? I'll make sure to write my notes down.

Also, last night I finally busted out some big ol' headphones and grabbed my iPod and, while C was engaged with Cougar Town on the couch, I pumped some jams into her belly. C got first pick: Passion Pit's Little Secrets (one of her recent favorites); for sentimental reasons I opted for Come Away With Me by Norah Jones (the first dance at our wedding); C got impatient at this point and allowed one more song--my choice again: Sizzla's Praise Ye Jah which I'm sure really got Baby inspired...

I hope to keep this as a pretty regular occurrence. I have lots of music that I'd love Baby to hear...

ABC

2010-02-01T15:29:00.001-05:00

Maybe this is cool?

"Alphabet City: Out on the Streets" a board book by M. De Feo

Nameless + aches, house

2010-02-01T13:20:00.002-05:00

We are really struggling to come up with a name for you, Baby.

Trying to find one with a good meaning, maybe something that is derived from a family member, something that fits with our last name...

At one point we started straying from names to nouns, but hopefully soon we'll find something we just love. Even if it's a noun.

--

C has been feeling good, generally. Foot aches, waking up multiple times in the night, frequent need to pee, other back and joint aches... all add up to be pretty exhausting. She has to deal with a lot over the course of a day, so piles of dirty dishes, laundry, messes in the kitchen, unfinished projects around the house all seem pretty overwhelming and depressing. Lately, I've made it my first priority to make sure a dish doesn't sit in or around the sink for more than 24 hours. I especially try to get every dish done right after dinner. I think it's helping.

Timbuk 2 Messenger Bag Diaper Hack

2010-01-27T21:54:00.010-05:00

So, I decided that the Timbuk2 2010 Classic Messenger Bag (size Medium) will be the ideal diaper bag conversion. This new style, released within the last week or so, appears to be a HUGE improvement over the older classic messenger bag. It comes standard with a bunch more pockets, including the novel "Napoleon Pocket" (accessible even when the flap is closed), external and internal organizers, a divider in the main compartment, and strap pad... I'm not pumped about the standard color options, but the cost difference for a "custom" option isn't worth it... This bag is $90 (I got 10% and free shipping, so $81 for me); custom option would be around $145... I also wish a "grab strap" came standard. Here are some images of the bag--can you see why I think this would be a good diaper bag? Much better than diaper bags marketed to "dudes."

I'm partial to the big open compartment because that's what I have in my big Seagull messenger backpack.

If anyone from Timbuk2 comes across this blog and wants to help hook up a young, soon-to-be parent that cares to review some good and useful stuff, get at me: j.david.strong@gmail... (Heh. Fat chance, eh?)

Add a changing pad that also holds a case of wipes, a bottle cooler... What else? I'm still trying to figure that out... Timbuk 2 also has these clear flex packs in 3 sizes which could offer storage for extra diapers and other things...

Heart Rate

2010-01-27T13:10:00.001-05:00

Had a crazy shake-up this morning. I don't have a lot of details because I wasn't at the doctor check-up today, but apparently the baby had an unusually high heart rate, up around 180 bpm. The doctor was freaked out enough to send C to get more extensive monitoring (Non Stress Test, or NST) over 30 minutes. The heart rate fluctuated between 140 and 210 bpm throughout that time, and apparently it would rise when the baby was moving. The doctor took this as a good sign of relatively normal conditions.

Of course, C told me this over the phone while crying--she was rightfully shaken and stressed out about the surprise experience--so I felt super helpless and confused. What can we do? Is there a way we can monitor in case this condition gets bad? Apparently not.

I met C at a McDonald's and though while I wasn't perhaps as comforting as I should have been, at least felt like I was able to be a little bit comforting. It was just nice to control something (i.e. travel the 1 mile down the road to see C and give her a kiss) instead of just sitting behind my desk and failing at finding answers on Google...

After calling my mom with the update I came to the conclusion I should probably go buy one of those at-home doppler heart-rate monitoring devices... and maybe calling the doctor's office to find out more about at-home monitoring we can do... Fortunately we've started our 2-week visits, so monitoring will happen more frequently.

Hiccups

2010-01-26T16:24:00.000-05:00

I can't believe I forgot to post this: the baby had hiccups the other day. It had to have been hiccups because there were so many little bumps, once per second, for I don't know how long. It was so unbelievable and adorable. I actually started to feel bad because you just want to be like "it's okay, it will be over soon". Haha... too funny.

Diapers - You've been bamboozled

2010-01-23T12:36:00.001-05:00

I've spent parts of this morning looking up information about diapers - specifically, cloth diapers. I've read some pretty persuasive stuff from the companies trying to convince me to buy their stuff. But it seems pretty legit. I got a little freaked out when I learned that newborns need about 10 - 12 diaper changes per 24 hr period - which equates to needing 24 - 30 diapers (and 7 to 8 diaper covers) in the first year. But still, over two and a half years, the cost should be nearly half of what disposables cost...

Anyway, I found that one particular product is called "The Bamboozle" (cause it's made of bamboo fibers). This immediately reminded me of the Friends episode where Joey is auditioning for a game show called "Bamboozled" where when you lose (or something) he says "You've been Bamboozled!" So, when you realize you need to change a poopy diaper you could say, outloud, "You've been Bamboozled!"

Anyway, I think I'm sold on the cloth diapers thing...
--
Off to go register at Babies'R'Us...

Crazy + Gear + Diaper bag hack

2010-01-19T17:06:00.000-05:00

Ok, ok, ok. So, after reading my last post, C more or less implied I was insane for thinking the baby was going to come so early. She is convinced we are right on time--no less--with our scheduled schedule. So week 28 it remains.

I guess I'm just getting a little freaked out about the stuff we intend to do before Miss Baby is born--add plumbing in the basement, finish the basement, organize our art room, and, finally, finish the nursery. I live by the "expect the worst, hope for the best scenerio"--not that the baby coming early is in anyway the "worst" of anything, but it shortens a schedule to complete things I mostly don't know how to do...

In the meantime, we're bracing ourselves for a couple baby showers--not even thinking about for what we will register--and figuring out what else we need. Speaking of gear, I'm fixated on getting a dope (bicycle-) messenger style bag and hacking it into a hipster-friendly diaper bag. I don't want to say man-friendly, because that's not what I mean. I mean cool and legit, and something that could be used well beyond the diaper years, especially when I ride my bike. The front-running brand seems to be Timbuk 2 and its relatively low cost-to-pockets ratio. A local company, Seagull Bags, is a bit more expensive but offers stuff like custom pockets and organizers. It would be great if C liked it too--I may be able to tempt her with a nice color palette... Probably not. This idea would cost us around $100 more than those "man-friendly" diaper bags.

Week 28? Fast Forward?

2010-01-18T09:49:00.000-05:00

I've got a sneaking suspicion that we are actually at least one week ahead of where we think we are in the line of pregnancy. After our last big ultrasound the doctor said Miss Baby was a little bigger than she is supposed to be; and at the last check-up, when measuring C's belly, she again said we seemed to be "ahead."

So, this morning, when checking "my stories" (i.e. blogs), I find that this one woman jumped from 19 weeks--where she thought she should be--to 21 weeks after their ultrasound. Hmm...

I'm not trying to get ahead of myself, but I'm putting together a timeline of when stuff needs to get done around the house, and I think to be safe I need to count on Miss Baby arriving around April 1st--or, dare I say, the end of March. Crap.

Not "Crap". I mean, we have a house--so we aren't that bad off. A 3 bedroom house at that. The only problem is, while trying to finish half of our basement, the other 2 bedrooms are staging areas for loads of junk. We could move it all downstairs but we're supposedly getting work done down there... If worse comes to "Crap" (for real) then we'll move everything downstairs or in the garage. We'll make it work. My one goal is to have a pristine and magnificent baby room finished before the baby needs it.

We have another ultrasound scheduled for Week 36--that's 2 months away, and could potentially be the day our baby is born! Yowza.

3 months to go!

2010-01-11T20:42:00.000-05:00

Today marks 3 months until our April 11th due date. Yikes. And Yeah!

We need to get some stuff done around the house, much pronto! Hold on baby! Keep growing and wiggling, but don't come too soon. We'll try to get stuff done so you can be a week or two premature to help mom out and still have a place to comfortably stay when you get here. Word? Word. I knew you'd understand. You're like me and keep it chill and easy. No worries.

Astrology

2010-01-08T15:42:00.000-05:00

On the phone, C just pointed out that Baby Girl will most likely be "an Aries+--born between March 21st and April 20th. This is the abridged version of what I found out about "The Ram":

* Adventurous and energetic
* Pioneering and courageous
* Enthusiastic and confident
* Dynamic and quick-witted

On the dark side...
* Selfish and quick-tempered
* Impulsive and impatient
* Foolhardy and daredevil

Nursery Inspiration

2010-01-06T14:15:00.000-05:00

I can't convince these pictures to line up in pretty ways, but here is some stuff I like:

amy coe Westport Combo Changer

amy coe Stamford Combo Changer

Carter's Sleep Haven Single Crib

Monte Design - Luca Glider

Andrea Rund (Ikea)

Hampen (Ikea)

Ikea PS Maskros

Paternity Leave?

2010-01-05T10:40:00.000-05:00

I promised C that I would talk with my boss about taking time off after the baby is born (a.k.a. paternity leave). In the US, a dad can take 12 weeks of unpaid leave--and have a job at the same pay when he returns--if that job is the government or is a company with more than 50 employees among some other stipulations. Unfortunately, my company, which has the most employees it's ever had, is over-staffed by 5 people.

This is what Babycenter.com has to say:

How and when should I request leave?

...Consider discussing paternity leave with your employer as soon as you're ready to announce the pregnancy — usually after your partner's first trimester... You'll be in a stronger position to negotiate a leave if you approach your boss with a specific plan and allow him or her plenty of time to help you implement it. ~~(If you have trusted co-workers who have been through this before, ask them how they handled their leave and what kind of reaction they got.)~~ Offer your boss solutions rather than problems by having some ideas for how your work can be handled while you're away. Consider asking for leave and getting approval early in the pregnancy even if you're not sure you'll want to or be able to take unpaid leave when the time comes. It's easier to come back early than it is to ask for more time.

What if I don't qualify for leave under FMLA?

If you work ~~only part time or~~ for a small company, you don't qualify for paternity leave under FMLA and your employer may not provide this benefit. If this is the case, it can't hurt to ask your boss for a leave of absence anyway. Many companies may still be willing to negotiate some sort of time off for a valued employee. The earlier you start making a case for yourself as a valuable, hard-working person, the better position you'll be in for bargaining...

If you're still not getting anywhere, make sure you find out whether you're entitled to some kind of leave under your state's laws as these benefits may be more generous than the FMLA. Talking with other new dads about how they managed time away from work might also give you more creative ideas about how to take the time off to bond with your newborn child.

How can I make the most of my time with my family if I can't take unpaid leave?

If you're not able to take paternity leave, here are a few ideas for maximizing your time with your new family:

• Consider working overtime before your baby comes and exchange it for time off after the birth.
• On nights when you don't have to work the next day, have your partner wake you up when the baby is finished nursing so you can be the one to rock her back to sleep. Or take turns getting up for feedings.
• Your child will experience many "firsts" in her first year of life. Whenever these events can be scheduled, do so when you have time off from work.
• During the first year of your baby's life, look at any activities that take you away from your baby. Consider saying no to some of those events to spend more time with your newborn.

Week 26

2010-01-04T13:46:00.003-05:00

For a long while now, C has tuned into the FitPregnancy online pregnancy calendar for weekly updates on the growth of Miss Baby Girl. This is what they say for Week 26, which started yesterday:

Your baby weighs about 1 1/2 pounds and has undergone a growth spurt in the past few weeks... [She] would be about a foot tall if she could stand. This week marks a major milestone in your baby's hearing and sight. Your baby's hearing system (cochlea and peripheral sensory end organs)... is now completely formed, and over the next few weeks, she'll become increasingly sensitive to sound. In about a month, you'll feel her jump if she hears a sudden loud noise. Sound passes easily into your uterus, which helps her ears develop. Her eyes are almost fully formed. ...The air sacs of the lungs, called alveoli, will be developed by the end of this week and will begin to secrete a substance called surfactant that keeps the lung tissue from sticking together.

Pretty dope. Sounds like we should be talking, reading, and singing to Miss Baby Girl...

2010 is here and just like I anticipated I feel the pressure to get the house prepared for B.G.'s arrival. We found a crib we both really like, and maybe even a dresser. Over the weekend we organized a bunch of hand-me-down clothes and even bought some kid-sized hangers. I'm also a proud owner of a Babies-R-Us rewards card. All that is left to find is a comfy chair, an overhead lamp, a large rug, curtain fabric, and some wall art... Piece of cake, right?

Future

2009-12-22T16:48:00.000-05:00

What C is afraid of:

What I am afraid of:

It's not that either of us want the other thing, but both scenarios have come up in conversation between us. C made a good point that we will be our child's role models and will try to set her (them?) on the path we think is right from the start... I may have fallen a little farther from the tree, but I turned out to be more than alright, I think. Anyway, I thought this would make a pretty funny juxtaposition. Yeah, that's the Lunachicks on the top. Ha

Baby bumps

2009-12-22T13:31:00.000-05:00

Baby girl has been punching and kicking and otherwise ramming C from the inside like crazy lately. After a post-dinner bite of some Godiva dark chocolate almond bark--which may not have anything to do with this--baby girl was just flailing around. It was fun to feel and even watch.

Sometimes Alden--our dog--wants to lay across C's lap and I hope someday soon he'll feel those little bumps too and notice...

We've been driving ourselves nuts trying to think of names...

play: push bike

2009-12-17T15:31:00.001-05:00

this is a long way off, but looks like a lot of fun for a kid to have: "designed to teach kids from the ages of 2 to 5 to ride a bike without ever using training wheels." (seen at roll-online.com)

Fat beats, great presents

2009-12-16T20:55:00.000-05:00

Text message from C this morning, after her doctor appointment: "Heartaeat 150 but our baby is fat!"

Translation: "The baby's heartbeat is 150 bpm; according to the measurements from our last ultra-sound, the baby appears to be larger (and heavier) than expected! Yikes!"

The good news is the doctor said C's belly... and uterus?... appear to be the right size and in the right place, respectively...

More good news, we keep getting amazing presents from people and the feeling is just so awesome. Pictures to come!

Belly bumps, names

2009-12-13T15:02:00.000-05:00

The baby is starting to kick more and we've even been able to see quick, little bumps through C's belly. Pretty crazy. This morning I was spooning C and had my hand on her belly. Every time I felt a kick, I'd give a couple weak squeezes. C said I was tickling the baby. Pretty funny and pretty awesome too.

Not much is new. Just trying to comb through every possible girl name. Looking for inspiration on TV, in magazines, in movies, in baby name books... I'd like to say we have a short list of favorite names, but even that handful of names is a long way away from commitment. I'll start worrying about not having a name when she's born and we get stuck calling her "Babe."

FB

2009-12-08T09:10:00.000-05:00

Mommy's little monster

2009-12-07T22:40:00.000-05:00

After visiting the "doctor" (ultrasound technician)--who was great, by the way--C and I celebrated with lunch and a milkshake at Arby's, then a mini shopping spree at Once Upon A Child. Basically a thrift store for babies. Having combed through the "girls" section, we poked around in what the "boys" get and C pulled out this hidden treasure. A Misfits onesie for 12-18 month-olds. See that price? $1.50. No joke. I was so pumped. In fact, when we first found out we were pregnant, I envisioned our kid in a Misfits shirt.

proof

2009-12-07T22:19:00.004-05:00

everything is good in the hood

Updates: belly, food, doctor

2009-12-05T11:07:00.000-05:00

I'm bummed I haven't been updating much. Time is flying almost as fast as C's belly is growing. She looks great, like, absolutely beautiful. Unfortunately she doesn't see it that way. It doesn't help that her boobs are apparently still growing. And she doesn't feel awesome all the time--sleeping is more often than not pretty uncomfortable on her spine and hips--but just yesterday she was saying she feels so much better than she did in the first trimester. Her "taste" has not only returned to normal, she is actually craving healthy foods. Last night was the second time she made these really awesome meatballs in kale and pasta. Freaking amazing. And she's craving kale! This particular meal might be my favorite meal she's ever cooked and it's out of her "Feed Your Belly" pregnancy book. She's been working out more, especially at the gym. It's good because it compels me to go too and I need to exercise just as much as she does.

Anyway, things are going swimmingly. They baby gets roudy at least once almost every night, kicking like a riotous mosher in the pit. Monday is our big, important ultrasound where we will hopefully learn the sex of our little buddy. Unfortunately it is across the city, unlike our doctor who is about a mile away, and, as far as I understand, this technician won't even be able to tell us anything substantial about the baby's health/condition--we'll have to wait until we see our doctor next, the following week.

I can't believe Christmas is almost here. I really need to start getting some stuff done in the basement... Crap.

play inspiration

2009-11-24T14:37:00.000-05:00

this tee-pee idea comes from a dad blog, Pacing the Panic Room, that I started following when his wife was around 25 weeks pregnant. Check out the maternity series -- really rad photo documentation of the belly-growing process. I hope to build super cool things like this for our baby, despite the fact that currently she likes to hide from me when I try to feel her kicking. she'll learn to like me, I know it

fun with music

2009-11-24T10:13:00.000-05:00

this has me excited about the endless creativity, curiosity, and energy of young kids

Think I Got A Beat - Hi-tek

20 weeks

2009-11-22T20:14:00.000-05:00

Today marks the beginning of the 20th week of C's pregnancy. I can't believe we are (she is) this far along. She did remind me that we were clueless for the first month--but 16 weeks has cruised. 20 more weeks seems like an eternity and a blink at the same time.

C had asked that I organize something special for today, and I failed, unsurprisingly. I'm not good at it. I honestly put some thought into it: get a hotel for a weekend getaway--something of which I couldn't see us taking much advantage... that's pretty much where I stopped. I am really good at knowing what she doesn't like, but come up short when it comes to knowing what she does want. We ended up going to Cleveland to visit C's family, which we had sort of been planning in light of Thanksgiving with my family next week, and it was a really good time, as usual. Papa is in a rehab center, so we've been anxious to pay him and Nanny a visit. C's mom cooked us a pre-Thanksgiving meal last night and it was awesome.

So, after getting home, we did some chores around the house, and a clean house always makes us both feel good. I did convince her to let me pick up some food from a restaurant downtown she really likes, and stopped to pick up a bouquet of small hot-pink roses from the grocery store. 20-freakin-weeks! It deserves a lot more celebration than what I managed to pull together.

I wish I didn't suck so much at being romantic and surprising and whatever. There's no excuse, I am just bad at it.
(P.S. Coincidentally, today is also Alden's 2nd birthday!)

sex vs gender

2009-11-20T15:13:00.001-05:00

The other night I was out with 2 co-workers and they were asking about how the pregnancy was going. I mentioned we had hoped to have an ultrasound "to find out the gender of the baby" then quickly corrected myself to say "the sex of the baby." They both looked at me, sort of dumbfounded that I would replace "gender" with "sex" saying "they mean the same thing."

I am not well versed on the subject, but to me, the word "sex" refers to genitalia; and as I understand it "gender" is a social construct that polarizes "male" (or masculine) and "female" (or feminine).

Now, I'm not trying to get too semantically deep. A lot of time I want to be a manly man that is masculine. But a lot of times I feel insecure or whatever because I'm not so much. I'm sensitive, and I cry, and I can sew, and don't know half the rules of football, and hate baseball, and so on and so forth...

Anyways, for our baby I'm aiming to stress gender-neutrality to a certain degree. I don't have a problem with having a boy that gets obsessed with football or a girl that likes pink, or vice versa.

I've not done much to research any prevailing thought or philosophies or insights or the like, but feel pretty confident that what I think makes sense...

Thoughts?

Earth to baby

2009-11-16T21:39:00.000-05:00

I just tried making contact with the baby. Without a clever bone in my body, I said a few boring things into C's belly, then laid my head on it with both of my hands pressed into the rest of the available space on her skin. I kissed it then informed C that the baby was sleeping.

Apparently the baby can hear what's going on in the real world, so maybe we'll make a habit of talking to the baby. I suggested we start reading to it (which might be the only way to get me to read a book)

C has a doctor appointment tomorrow... more to come

Sticky Buns

2009-11-11T12:53:00.002-05:00

Email from C:
I think the baby loves sticky buns! I have read online that the baby will kick more/be more active about 1/2 hour after eating sugar and it's doing the same thing it was doing last night after my sticky bun! Maybe that means at least I don't normally eat a lot of sugar

Judo kick

2009-11-10T21:28:00.000-05:00

I think I just felt the baby kick - no lie!
--
Oh yeah - here are the wool socks:

Love

2009-11-06T16:21:00.002-05:00

Sent by my dad, to me and C both:

Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit. Bill Cosby

Wool, Gender...

2009-11-05T14:02:00.001-05:00

I've had good intentions to write a post that included a photo of the first present I bought for our expected buddy: two pairs of merino wool baby booties, colored orange and green--as gender neutral as I could get...

I'm obsessed with wool and it's inherent ability to keep animals (including human animals) warm and dry... Anyway, they are kinda cute, and despite all the reviews that complained about them being too small, I bought them anyway. They were on sale too...
--
All is well around here. C hasn't been burdened by nausea so much, but did learn that peanut butter granola for breakfast will make her puke her brains out a few hours later... wooops.

Not much else to report. Trying to get an ultra sound scheduled before Thanksgiving, at which point we hope to find out the sex of the baby. I haven't put a lot of thought into it beyond being anxious to know and to start narrowing down baby names, or at least rule a few out. It seems pretty hip these days to not find out and be super gender neutral about stuff, but I don't see any harm in knowing. I don't plan on forcing football on a boy, or Barbie Dolls on a girl. No matter what I plan on impressing our child with punk rock, skateboards, bikes, and gardening... I do have some slight concerns about a future baby shower and receiving gifts that are all pink or all blue...
--
Oh, and C was looking on a Chinese Gender Calendar or something, and determined that, based on the month of conception, our baby will be a girl... weird...

Sleep

2009-10-28T12:43:00.000-04:00

C's stomach has generally been feeling better during the day, but sleep has been rough on her and her back is really starting to suffer. Not sure if it mostly the fault of our mattress, or if it is purely the result of her growing belly. Anyways, we are seriously considering getting a new mattress--about which I know nothing...

I actually slept really well last night, and felt more awake this morning than I have in a while. It was probably because I had made coffee last night and set the delay brew for 6:45 this morning...

Speaking of coffee, I've been selfishly enjoying my caffeinated brew daily, while C has managed to keep away from it usually. We both know it's not very good for the baby, but understand that small amounts of caffeine wont hurt (apparently it's okay to drink wine???), but might boost C's spirits/mood/feelings/patience/energy at times.
--
I'll mention I've been having a lot of premonitions that the baby is a girl...

Workin out

2009-10-26T22:05:00.001-04:00

It's been really hard for C to get motivated to exercise since being pregnant. As little as I can understand what she has to deal with, it makes total sense that trying to go on a run or lifting weights, or whatever, would seem impossible.

Over the weekend C found a couple pre-natal workout and yoga DVDs. We ended up getting Kathy Smith's "Pregnancy Workout" (Classic edition). I can't find a date on this obviously re-issued video, but these film stills will give you a great idea of what we found.

At the end of the workout, the pregnant ladies are found in a line with Ray-Bans or side-ways baseball caps and start rapping, 80's-style, about being pregnant. Check it out:

I don't think this is really going to get C working out, but it did afford some good laughs... Back to the drawing board

Heartbeat

2009-10-21T22:14:00.000-04:00

Doctor appointment today. Not sure what went down while I was sipping coffee over Fit Pregnancy magazine, but I got called back to hear the baby's heartbeat. 140 bpm, I think, plus a few "kicks."

Next step, trying to get the H1N1 vaccine.

Sleep, Body

2009-10-18T13:29:00.001-04:00

Some quick updates (in no particular order):
--
C has had a little trouble sleeping due to the fact she can't sleep on her stomach and, apparently, shouldn't sleep on her back either. Yesterday afternoon I spied on her sleeping on the couch, slumped over on her knees in the "fetal" position so that the weight of her upper body was resting on her shoulders/face. Pretty cute. I was tempted to take a picture but figured that wouldn't make her happy and that this was honestly a subconscious attempt to rest in a new position without suffocating the bambino.
C has been complaining a little about her sore back. It's probably a pretty normal ache but she reminded me that she had been diagnosed with scoliosis which could be a serious concern in some cases... Keeping an eye on that.
--
Without going into too much detail, C had a rude awakening at Victoria's Secret recently when she realized she had jumped to yet another bra size. Let me just say it involves two letters and that some women would pay money to have this size chest. For C, it was mildly funny, slightly dumbfounding, but more depressing than anything.
--
We have a doctor appointment this week so hopefully we'll have a solid update then!

Visiting family, Health, House, Work

2009-10-09T11:12:00.000-04:00

It's been a hot minute since any update. As this is a journal of sorts, I owe it to myself to check in.

Well. Things have been good. Mostly quiet. C's nausea seems to be subtly waning away into nothingness.

We were at a family function over the weekend and everyone there knew the news of our pregnancy--which was nice because we could talk freely about it. The moms were able to share stories and were curious to hear about C's experience.

Just before that event we had stopped by C's cousins' house to visit them and their 2-week old daughter. How freaking small! Like, freakishly tiny. I was blown away--like, I had never seen a newborn before. It was the first time I got a little freaked out, like, "This is gonna be us in 6 months!" A new piece of furniture that it seems we don't yet have the space for. We were able to share our good news with them and they were happy for us.

I need to get my butt to work and finish our basement--finish the drywall, add some flooring, and get a bathroom installed down there. After that we can start on a baby's room...
--
Fears about H1N1/"Swine Flu" are rising and I'm trying to keep optimistic about everything. So many things can go wrong between now and forever that I just can't let those fears dwell in my head space.
--
C and I got in a little argument yesterday about my job and the pressure to work "above and beyond" as a non-exempt yet supposedly "highly-compensated" salaried employee at a fledgling company (this means I'm expected to work over 40 hours a week without over-time pay). I believe any other job in the same line of work will come with similar demands/expectations. The alternative? Quit and become a stay-at-home dad. Maybe get a part-time job. I agree that we could probably take the cut in total income... Is it possible? Would it work? Not yet comfortable with the idea of quitting my job, but can see that it would suck to leave the baby every day in the hands of strangers I'm paying to do what a parent should be doing.

Quote

2009-09-23T22:52:00.002-04:00

A waist is a terrible thing to mind. -Jane Caminos

--

I keep reminding C that she's supposed to be gaining weight. I can understand that it's frustrating, but when she complains she always sounds surprised.

Doctor Visit 2

2009-09-23T22:08:00.000-04:00

This morning C went to the doctor. I wasn't there, but a part of me feels like I should have been. More than that, I wish I would have been there. She got to hear the baby's heart beat via sonogram. 160 beats per minute. According to Wikipedia, during strenuous exercise, an adult's pulse ranges from 150-200 bpm. I think this means it's running a marathon inside C's belly.

I've made chocolate chip (Fiber One, just-add-water) pancakes after dinner for the past two nights which I agree is a good dessert option.

During last week, C seemed to be a little more emotional than usual; asking me nearly every waking hour if I loved her.

C: "Do you love me?"
Me: "Mos def" or "No doubt."

It was a pretty nice exercise and I haven't gotten annoyed like I would if it were anything else. I started trying to beat her to the punch once in a while to ask if she loved me. She would jokingly pause to think about it.

The numerous weeks of constant nausea have really been getting C down. Hopefully that subsides soon and we can really get into enjoying this pregnancy (as much as one couple can).

Vacation: Part I

2009-09-17T09:09:00.000-04:00

Hello from South Carolina. We've been on vacation in Myrtle Beach for 5 days now. We left Saturday evening, stayed in a hotel near the Virginia-West Virginia border, and arrived on Sunday afternoon. Things have been relatively great: C's nausea has been pretty low, she's been sleeping relatively well, and nothing has been terrible. Ha. That doesn't sound like a good report, but honestly it is. We're having fun with my family, the weather has been awesome, and above all we are really enjoying ourselves. Early on, C joked that feeling good on this trip was a sign that she needed to quit work. I think there is some truth in that, no doubt.

We've been keeping the trip pretty low key. We did take one risky adventure: horseback riding. We signed a waiver that warned pregnant women should not risk riding horses. Just like all other warnings, it's never clear if they mean women of all stages of pregnancy or not. According to... the internet... its acceptable to ride a horse during the first, if not also the second trimester. The risk comes with falling or getting kicked. So, we wore helmets to be safe. No joke.

Other than that I over-packed groceries for the trip. Multigrain Cheerios, Fiber Plus pancake mix, wheat bread, pitas, trail mix, bananas, caffiene-free soda, ginger ale, granola bars, chips, protein drink, V8 juice, popcorn... We haven't touched half that stuff, but a few of those things have been very handy to curb morning sickness--especially handfuls of the Cheerios in the morning.

So far so good.

FuzziBunz contest

2009-09-09T10:43:00.002-04:00

Ok, so, if you don't know me, you don't know that I'm a sucker for contests. Well I am and this post is my raffle ticket of sorts.

Since C and I have starting thinking about starting a family I've been following this blog, Pacing the Panic Room, of an amazing photographer who started a blog about having his first child.

Well, long story short, this guy, Ryan, set up a contest for a young family to win some cloth diapers and I'm all over it. The company that hooked him up is Fuzzibunz. I'm super pumped about cloth diapers, and this company has got some rad innovation. Anyways, the thought of starting to provide this early for the little seed that is growing in C's belly is exciting enough.

Check out PTPR if you are interested in the contest details or want some more insights about FuzziBunz and cloth diapers.

Good Life Go!

Food

2009-09-07T00:03:00.000-04:00

C has always worried about her weight and now the unsurprising gain is no exception. Periodically she checks in to make sure I will still love her despite "not doing anything" or "getting fat." It drives me nuts. But I guess it doesn't hurt to be so reassuring. I am making it my mission to make sure the fridge and cabinets are stocked with plenty of easy and healthy options. I haven't argued with the requests for Burger King or Wendy's or Skyline--though C has even admitted that some of those particular cravings weren't worth satisfying. Black bean sandwiches from Skyline have been coming pretty constant and despite the fact we've had them three days in a row, the guys that make them still can't figure out "light cheese."

We haven't been thinking about the baby much. All of our attention has been focused on nausea and food recently. We've sort of forgotten about the little grape-sized person.

Sharing the news

2009-09-02T20:45:00.000-04:00

On a walk with Ald, C asked when I was going to tell my dad and stepmom. I decided to do it right then, but couldn't figure out how to divulge our secret creatively. C said we should tell them to get on their computer and go to my (other) blog, adayinthegoodlife.blogspot.com, and then tell them to change the "y" to a "d". It was perfect. My stepmom picked up on it right away: "You're a 'dad'?!" After maybe as many as 20 seconds all I could hear out of Dad was, "Shit!" They were both super pumped to realize the news. For most of the conversation, C and I had our heads pressed together to share the speaker of the phone. They were really happy for us and sent lots of love and blessings, even to "Prince Alden".

Telling our parents has been really exciting and fun and very encouraging. While everything has been so secretive lately, this is has been a huge relief and such a positive reinforcement.

--
Today I got this text from C: "Super puke in hallway and men's bathroom... 10:45 is my doom time!"
Bummer.
--
I am realizing that morning sickness is to be pretty standard for a while now, as it has been. I'll try to keep discussion of that pretty minimal and will be thrilled to write about the end of it.

2009-08-31T09:39:00.000-04:00

Not too much is new: C has continued to be fighting a cough, which has been compounded by an increasingly sore throat, as well as intermittent nausea. It seems like the nausea is generally getting better--or at least, more infrequent.

I'm hearing more reports about how pregnant women really really need to get vaccinated for Swine Flu--but then they say shots wont be available until October. WTF? I don't get it.

I'm trying to make sure C gets a regular flu shot as soon as she can.

Also, got HUGE news from my sister-in-law and her husband (a.k.a. "J&M")... more on that much later.

Coughing

2009-08-27T09:38:00.000-04:00

As few as two days ago, C developed a dry cough that seems only to be a problem in the middle of the night. I don't believe it's really part of a cold, but for as persistent as it has been, I have no clue. The only real concern I have about it is the loss of sleep from which both of us are starting to suffer. A couple varieties of cough-drops are scattered throughout the house and in various bags. Hopefully she'll take my advice and take some honey on bread or in warm water.

Anyway, not much is new. She threw up yesterday but I feel like the discomfort that comes with the coughing has kept her complaints about nausea to a minimum.

Last night I found her looking at baby products online. A pack'n-play/bassinet combo? Car-seats too. I wasn't too surprised at the price of those things and wouldn't hesitate to spend more money on better quality... gear. I'm a gear-head in my own right, so I guess that's no surprise, to myself.

First doctor visit!

2009-08-25T13:06:00.002-04:00

Today I was supposed to travel to Cincinnati for work with Mark and two colleagues from the company that contracted us. Last Friday was the day I realized that this work trip and C's first big appointment with the doctor were going to conflict. My stomach hit the floor at that staff meeting. Not knowing how to broach the subject--as we've decided to keep the news a secret--I kept my mouth shut. As the weekend went on I started questioning whether I should mention everything to Mark in an effort to stay in town and go to the appointment. Sunday night I decided I would approach Mark and try to avoid Cincy. Yesterday afternoon, when I got back to the office from the field, I went into Mark's office and asked if he had a moment to talk as I shut the door behind me. I could tell he was instantly panicked as I never appear so serious. I knew he thought I was preparing to tell him I was quitting. I teared up as I started with "I didn't want to tell you like this..." and broke the news that C was pregnant. What I meant was that I wanted to tell him later on down the road, when the pregnancy was more certain, and we could be enjoying a beer at the bar. I was really emotional--which made me quite embarrassed--but to let the flood of excitement about the baby and stress about work pour out got to me. Long story short, Mark was super supportive and at one point said, "There are definitely things more important than work." I could barely believe how supportive he was--but then again, I know Mark is a big family man and while he appears to be a workaholic, he definitely does everything he can for his family and so would understand why this first visit to the doctor would be so important.

So, today we were able to wake up slower than usual to prepare for our first exam. The doctor seems really cool and I was thrilled to witness the first ultrasound that showed a little bean with a heartbeat. C seemed pretty annoyed that I made such a deal about being there, but hopefully, deep down, she was relieved that I was nearby and so excited. Everything is still so early, but today's visit calmed the biggest fears we've faced so far, to let room for a whole new round of concerns to settle in.

We left the office with a couple photos of our blueberry sized embryo and treated ourselves to second-breakfast at Panera. Awesome.

Good life go!

August 23 (Sunday)

2009-08-25T13:03:00.001-04:00

Got home from our trip to Cincy. First time visiting Mom's new house. Just before Uncle David Phillippi's wedding, we told Mom our news that we were expecting. She screamed and kept saying "Are you serious!" She was super excited which made me feel really good. She was really pumped and was excited to talk about it for the rest of the time we were hanging out.
At the wedding, Abbie subtly called C out for being pregnant by aggressively inquiring about why C wasn't drinking alcohol. I guess she started asking how C was feeling in the mornings, devilishly prying for information. C played it off, proving that she never liked alcohol in the first place, and saying she'd been feeling well in the morning. I guess Abbie dropped it after that. Heh.
We were out pretty late--got back to Mom's around midnight. C was able to sleep in pretty well and was still exhausted all day. She's been bummed about the overwhelming tiredness, but I am not surprised and have tried to encourage her to sleep as much as possible.
Home now and picking up pizza for dinner. I've been trying to be really accomodating to C's appetite--which isn't unusual--but it seems like maybe she's even more pickey than usual. It's only complicated because she tries to make me decide and I feel like she should be the one calling those shots. Long story short, deciding about food has been a sloppy dance around options and indecision. This is the only thing that has annoyed me, and it's really not a big issue. Oh well. She hasn't been complaining much about nausea today which is great news. Hopefully this keeps up.

August 21 (Friday): Part II

2009-08-25T13:02:00.002-04:00

Just got a text message from C: "So sick. I don't understand how to deal with this and have any sort of normal life.."
What a bummer. I wish I could do something to make her feel better. The least I can do, I realize, is to do anything she asks to help her feel as comfortable as possible. And to do it without complaint.
One thing I forgot to add earlier is that I'm nervous about being home this weekend, around my parents and siblings, and to not tell them. It's really a bit premature to go spreading the news, and although I'm super excited and want my family to be excited, I just don't want to jump the gun. C has her first doctor's appointment on Tuesday (Aug 25), so we'll hopefully know a lot more by then. If only the appointment was before our trip to Cincy...

August 21 (Friday)

2009-08-25T13:01:00.000-04:00

Talking to C on Google Chat. She threw up for the first time today. Not every day has been so terrible, but today's nausea has been the worst apparently. Not sure what would make her feel better. Feeding her lots of bread and ginger-filled things. I think we've done as much as we can. We've managed to get to the gym a few nights this week for some exercise, and have been taking Alden on at least one walk per day. I think getting out has been keeping her mind off the sickness.
We're going to Cincy this weekend--uncle's wedding--and I'm worried it's just not going to be any fun to be around a lot of people--especially since we're trying to keep it a secret, mostly.

August 16 (Sunday)

2009-08-25T13:00:00.001-04:00

C's Bday. She's feeling sick again--as she has been for the past 3 or 4 days. Just straight nauseated. Trying home remedies like ginger ale mixed with lemonade. Apparently Canada Dry Ginger Ale doesn't have real ginger in it--just "natural flavors" and "caramel color" so I picked up some Reed's Original Ginger Brew from the grocery store's Natural Food section. Bread has seemed to work to settle C's stomach too.
I've been feeling really guilty about the nausea she's been experiencing and all the discomfort that will be weighing her down over the next 9 months, not to mention the trauma of child birth. I'm just counting on there being truth in all the good stories you hear about pregnancy and bonding with the baby growing inside. Hopefully this period of "morning sickness" passes quickly.

August 9 (Sunday): "Try to make him black!"

2009-08-25T12:59:00.004-04:00

Went to the gym.
A young dark skinned kid overheard me telling my name to the girl behind the desk.
"Strong. You should name your son Goliath" he said.
I replied, "You think that's cool, my wife's last name is Love."
"Love-Strong"
--
Later, on our way out, as we were walking down the stairs, we heard the kid holler up the stairway, "Love-strong!"
As we walked by I said, "We're trying to come up with baby names. What do you think?"
"Jordan" (patting both hands on his chest)
C: "Is that your name?"
"Yeah."
(We get further down the hall)
"Try to make him black!" he hollers while the girl behind counter gasps in embarrassment

Lots of laughter

August 8 (Saturday)

2009-08-25T12:57:00.002-04:00

Getting prepared to go to Yellow Springs with Gary, Sue, Mike, and Jess. We reveal to J & M that we're expecting--I held out the pregnancy test stick for them to read--C thought that was gross.

August 7 (Friday)

2009-08-25T12:56:00.002-04:00

Took another pregnancy test, to be sure.

Still "Pregnant"

August 2 (Sunday): Big news

2009-08-25T12:55:00.003-04:00

Returned home from a weekend in Cleveland. We had celebrated Nanny & Papa's 60th wedding anniversary, as well as Terry's 23rd birthday which brought lots of family in from out of town, plus multiple dogs, the fire pit, and beer.
C hadn't been feeling well and was feeling really curious about her body and her truant period. She wasn't sure about anything but knew she wasn't feeling right. To be honest, she didn't look different at all but I trust that she knows her body well. Between the highway and home we stopped to pick up a late lunch (Noodles & Company) and a pregnancy test. We both figured what the result would be - negative - and that it would ease our minds (hers especially). Just having the box of tests was nerve-wrecking but C wanted to wait. It was as if we already knew the answer - negative - and would just do it later, as if it were a load of laundry or something. After lunch, C decided to get it over with. Nonchalant, I went downstairs to cut some drywall. Moments later I heard a panicked "David!" as if a spider had just jumped out of the sink upstairs. I bounded up the steps because I realized there was a bit of excitement in her voice. She explained that even though the instructions said the digital result was expected to appear in 3 minutes, it showed up freakishly instantaneously as if the unanticipated answer was unmistakable. An answer we were both surprised to see: "Pregnant." Well, sort of surprised. I mean, for the past couple of months we were "not not trying" and had even put a little thought into when was a biologically correct time to conceive. I was even strategizing what days I would ride my bike to work so as to keep my little navy of sperm afloat (side note: people started noticing I was driving more and were getting inquisitive; I tried to play coy)... There was at least a little bit of effort.